Sudden surge in "fridge related injuries" reported by local hospitals

February 21, 2023

Following the release of the popularly controversial gaming title "Atomic Heart", there has been a strange increase in the number of fridge related accidents across the globe.

We've been working overtime, day and night, a patient who came in just last night had several fractures and crushed organs from his fridge somehow crushing him while he was lying in bed.

The exact cause of these incident has yet to be determined, but all the patients seem to have shared one thing in common, which is a steam profile that has more than 1 hour of play in Atomic Heart listed.

Several patients have come in with a similar injury of accidentally getting their genitals slammed in the fridge, we'd like to remind people to be cautious when getting that midnight snack in the nude.

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